Blog to the Future

Having recently succumbed to the desire for an iPad, I am learning how I like to use it. For example, I love to check email on it. Typing is much easier than on my cellphone. However, I have noticed a definite tendency towards more formal language. This is primarily because the apostrophe is not on the main keyboard.

I prefer to do my online shopping on my computer because there is more screen space.

I have tried iBooks, the Kindle app and the B&N eReader. I like reading books on the iPad. I prefer the B&N eReader interface, but their type resolution is poor. It is great on the kids' iPods, though. I haven't decide if I prefer the Kindle or iBook interface, but the Amazon store has more ebooks.

I am now trying out blogging apps. This is the first app I have tried. I'll let you know what I think.


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

Location:Harding Ave,Skokie,United States

Movie Matinee

Today the boys and I went to see Toy Story 3. If I had to sum up the story, I would describe it as the toys and Andy learning to adapt to changes in their lives. The toys learn what is important to hold on to as you go through life, which is, of course, each other. Andy learns that you can let go of some things (and people) as long as you hold on to the memories of the good times. I hope that the boys and I will be able to hold on to our memoris of Tim and the good times we had together as a family. But we are no longer the traditional family of four. We are now a family of three headed up by a single working mom. We have had to rebuild our sense of family to reflect our new reality, just as I have had to rebuild my sense of self. We are trying to move forward into our new lives. I just wish I was as hopeful about our future as Andy is when he heads off to college at the end of the movie.

Happy Independence Day

After a week of lovely dry weather, we have entered the hazy, hot and humid month of July. A big change from last year, when I wore a jacket and long pants to watch the fireworks. We decided to get some fireworks of our own this year, so on July 3, the boys and I went on a little road trip. If I'd planned ahead a little better, we would have done this road trip last weekend. There were three separate fireworks stands at this particular exit on the interstate and all three had lines out the door. Everybody was very nice about it, however, and the line moved right along. The boys and I made a quick trip through the store, trying to guess what everything did based on the cryptic descriptions on the packages. I wanted to stick to the smaller, quieter items, in order to avoid undue legal attention at home. We picked up a lot of sparklers, some smoke bombs and things that are supposed to spin and shoot sparks. We managed to get out of the store with an IKEA bag full of fireworks for just about $100. Not bad considering the store's top sale of the day was $1800.

We had timed our road trip to coincide with the supper hour, knowing we would pass both an A&W and a Culver's on the way home. Believe it or not, the A&W is the old-fashioned, orange-roofed restaurant complete with carhops! We decided to skip the A&W, though, since everyone else at the fireworks store had apparently stopped there for dinner. We drove one exit further south on the interstate to Culver's for burgers and frozen custard. That was when we got the hidden bonus of our trip. Just across the street from Culver's was a bakery that sold kringles! Kringles are a giant "O" shaped danish pastry filled with different kinds of fruit and covered in frosting. Yummy! I was very tempted by the key lime, but settled for the safer raspberry kringle.

Today was the first time in years that we didn't march in the Skokie Fourth of July parade. Our Cub Scout Pack marches in the parade, but the Boy Scout Troop doesn't. As we are no longer involved in Cub Scouts, we stayed out of the heat and skipped the parade completely. We had dinner at a friend's house and tested some of our purchases from yesterday. A couple of the items were a little noisier than I had hoped, but we had a great time none the less. It was sprinkling after dinner, so we decided not to head over to the high school for the fireworks. We'd gotten our fireworks fix the night before at the Wilmette fireworks, which are always on July 3. All in all, a very quiet Fourth, but pleasant just the same.

Boycott

Today it has been one year and one week since Tim passed away. It is also Father's Day. The boys and I aren't ready to celebrate Father's Day yet. So we are boycotting the holiday. I don't know if we'll be ready next year. I'll let you know.

Murphy's Law

Nothing went right this week. Nothing I planned happened when or as I had hoped and some things just didn't happen at all. Some of the things that went wrong ended up costing me a lot of money, too. I worked so hard all last week getting ready for the fishing trip on Saturday and party on Sunday. Everything went so well that this week's disasters seemed all that worse by comparison. By Friday, I just wanted to crawl into bed and stay there. It's times like this that I really miss having Tim around to complain to about my bad days or to give me a hug and cheer me up. It took me all day Saturday to just let go of the week's misadventures and find a fresh outlook.

Training My New Cleaning Service

Now that school is out for the summer, I decided that it was time for the boys to help out with the house cleaning. I told them that they had to spend one hour every day this week helping me clean the house. Monday and Tuesday they worked on their rooms. They both came home with bags of school projects and used school supplies. We had to sort out what should be thrown away, what could be used again and what should be saved for posterity. Wednesday we worked in the yard - weeding and mulching and washing down the back patio. Thursday was dust and vacuum day. We moved all the furniture in the living and dining rooms so we could vacuum underneath. I hadn't seen the underside of the sofa since Christmas, so it was more than time. Friday the boys cleaned the bathrooms and I cleaned the kitchen. I'm sure that they felt I nagged too much, making them go back and do a couple spots over again. Over all though, they were a big help and did a good job. I told them they were hired and should expect to do this again regularly.

What a Week

We are taking a breather today at the end of a very hectic several days. I am finally getting caught up on both my laundry and my sleep. The boys are catching up on their TV watching. We also got to eat a leisurely dinner together as a family for the first time in almost a week. What's kept us on the go? Well . .

Wednesday night was eighth grade graduation. My favorite part of the evening was something they call "Popcorn." The assistant principal reads a list of all the activities the students might have been a part of over their three years at middle school. The kids stand any time they were in that activity. They have to sit between every activity, even if they were in back to back events. Thus, the up and down that gives the section of the evening it's name. It's very cute. Theo was in his fair share of things, which made his mother proud.

Thursday was Brendan's turn to say goodbye. He and Theo will both be moving to new schools next year. The fifth grade farewell reception was much simpler, as it was just a short reception before the PTA picnic.

Friday we had another picnic dinner, this time with the Boy Scouts. Troop 72 held their June Court of Honor at a local park. Both of my boys received rank advancements. Brendan, who joined the troop in March, made Tenderfoot. Theo, who's been a scout for three years, received his Life rank. He beat the deadline for his last merit badge by the skin of his teeth. I am grateful to both his merit badge counselor and his scout master, who worked in meetings with Theo on the last troop meeting so Theo could get his Life rank before the Jamboree this summer.

Saturday we were spoiled for party choices. We could have gone to our church picnic, but decided that three nights of hot dog dinners was just too much. We went to birthday parties instead. Brendan went to an afternoon party at a friend's house. I was also invited to a birthday party Saturday night - a toga party! Yes, I did go in a toga. No, I'm not posting a picture of it.
After four days of non-stop activity, we are enjoying our day of rest.

Fine Arts Day

This morning I chaperoned Brendan's class on a field trip downtown. We went to the Art Institute of Chicago. I spent the afternoon shepherding five fifth grade boys through as much of the museum as we could get to in an hour and a half, which wasn't very much. The best part of the trip actually came before the Art Institute. Brendan's school had been participating in a program called "Do Your P'Art," which encouraged environmentalism through art. The kids made box collages out of recycled materials. These boxes were displayed downtown. Here is Brendan showing off his box.

The kids' art was displayed at a building across the street from the Merchandise Mart. The building guard suggested we go over to the Mart and check out the display of canned food art. Someone had sponsored a sculpture contest to promote hunger awareness. The artists made sculptures entirely out of canned food and other non-persible food items. Here is the Cubs logo made entirely from cans. If you look to the left of the logo, the background is a train made out of cans. There were several clever sculptures in this exhibit, including a giant slice of pizza and a giant sombrero made of El Paso Refried Bean cans.

To round out my day of fine arts, the final band concert was this evening. This is the "All-Band Concert," where all four of our district bands perform. This was Theo's final band concert, as he is moving on to high school next year and couldn't fit band into his schedule. Theo had a solo in their last song. It made me to cry to think of how proud Tim would have been of his son at that moment.

Water, Water Everywhere

It rained Wednesday night. It rained a lot. I remember being awakened by thunder more than once. I didn't realize just how much rain we had gotten until Thursday morning, when Brendan came into my room to inform me that there was water in the basement. Sad to say, water in our basement is not uncommon. It seeps up through the floor and trickles in through cracks in the basement walls. At this point, everything in our basement is up on legs or stored in plastic bins. Except, of course, when the boys leave things on the floor, like pillows, blankets and toys. I spent most of Thursday morning and afternoon using the shop vac to suck up all the water in the basement. I spent most of this morning washing the floor with bleach then turned on every fan I have and opened the windows to finish drying out the basement. Not how I planned to spent the last couple days, but at least my basement is nice and clean now.

Happy Birthday, Brendan!

Today is Brendan's 11th birthday. Yes, just four days after having birthday cake for Theo we are having birthday cake for Brendan. When you add in leftover birthday treats from school and leftover cake from birthday parties, we consume a lot of birthday cake in the month of May. While I had wanted two spring babies, I hadn't planned on having my children quite so close together. I remember feeling more than a bit dismayed when my OB calculated Brendan's due date as May 6. At first, I worried about the possibility of having to celebrate Theo's birthday while recovering from delivering a baby. Then, as we approached Theo's birthday, I worried about how I would handle things if they shared a birthday. I was very relieved when Theo's birthday passed with no baby. After that, my internal debate ranged between wanting to have as many days as possible between Theo's birthday and the baby's birthday and wanting to have the baby because being pregnant was so uncomfortable. Brendan finally resolved this dilemma by arriving on the afternoon of May 12.

Celebrating Everything

Tonight the boys and I went out to dinner with Theo's godmother, Ardis. We went to Trattoria D.O.C. in Evanston. The boys like this restaurant because they do wood-fired pizza. I like it because they do other things as well. We had a lot to celebrate. Due to an over crowed calendar, we decided to combine a number of occasions into a single celebration. So tonight we celebrated: Theo's confirmation (April 30), Theo's birthday (May 8), Ardis' birthday (also May 8), Mother's Day (May 9) and Brendan's birthday (May 12). Whew!

My Mother's Day

My children were born on May 8 and May 12. That means that Mother's Day is sometimes lost in all the birthday hoopla. My boys would say that their birthdays are occasionally lost to Mother's Day. (Have you ever tried to celebrate a child's birthday on Mother's Day? I have. It's not easy.) I also live in Skokie, which has a large conservative and orthodox Jewish population. That means we play AYSO soccer on Sundays, not Saturdays. So I have actually spent every Mother's Day since Theo was in first grade on the soccer field. (That's eight years, including this one.) I don't mind when the weather is good, but this is Chicago and the weather is very iffy on Mother's Day. I'm usually freezing and often wet on the soccer sidelines in May. You may remember that Theo broke his foot a week ago. He inadvertently gave me a great Mother's Day present - less time on the soccer field.

Happy Birthday, Theo!

Fourteen years ago at a little after nine in the morning, Tim and I welcomed our first child, Theodore Patrick Ward. He was 19 inches long and weighed eight pounds twelve ounces. He is now five foot seven and weighs around 125 pounds, depending on how much pizza he's had lately. We had a terrible time deciding on a name. As a Jennifer, the most popular name the year I was born, I did not want to give my child a common name. So any name in the current top 25 was automatically out. We finally settled on Theodore, but planned to call him Theo. His middle name is his Dad's middle name, which means they share the same initials, handy for passing down monogrammed china. Of course, we don't have monogrammed china.

First Friday

I just couldn't resist the title as I seem to taking an alliterative angle with my posts this week. After all, it is the first Friday in May. I also attended my first political luncheon today. As a result of the political work that I did for the Illinois primary this year, I received an invitation to be a part of a friend's table at Congresswoman Jan Schakowsky's Ninth Annual Ultimate Women's Power Lunch. Don't be too impressed. The food wasn't that good and the crowd was huge. The only elected politician I even got close to was the 49th Ward Alderman for the City of Chicago. I only met him because he happened to be standing next to my friend the former candidate. Or, rather, my friend the former candidate was standing next to the 49th Ward Alderman of the City of Chicago. My biggest thrill was meeting Hecky of Hecky's Barbecue, my favorite barbecue place in Evanston. Actually, I had a very nice afternoon. I got a chance to catch up with a lot of friends from the campaign. I also got to hear speeches from all of the major Democratic candidates running for office this year in the state of Illinois. Well, except for the Governor. He was in Springfield dealing with a budget crisis.

Theo's Thursday

Theo went to his first real live rock concert tonight. A good friend had an extra ticket to the Paramore concert in Rockford tonight. I don't know a lot about the band. I knew that Theo liked them because I bought him a CD for Christmas. I have discovered that Theo and I fit the old cliche about parents and their children when it comes to music. I don't actually consider most of what he likes to be music. It's loud, with a lot of drums and there doesn't seem to be much in the way of melody and harmony. Brendan hasn't really developed his own tastes yet, so the jury is still out there. Anyway, the boys left for the concert an hour after school was out for the day and they didn't get home until almost midnight. So Theo went to his first rock concert and I experienced my first stay up until midnight waiting for my child to get home from a night out. I wasn't worried, as the boys were with an adult the whole time. It was just an interesting taste of things to come.

Time Warp Wednesday

I've had a couple people ask me about why my blog posts take a week or more to show up in their RSS feeds. The answer is that your feed isn't slow, the blogger is. I keep daily notes in a hand written journal but usually only sit down to my computer once a week or so. I didn't start out this way. I had intended to blog daily or almost daily, anyway. My life got in the way. The first time I sat down to write after missing several days, I decided to back date entries so that the post date matched the date events actually happened. I thought this was more aesthetically pleasing and it made for better reading. One side benefit is that time occasionally provides better perspective and what I write is better for stewing around in my brain for a few days.

Of course, there are exceptions to this rule. Take this post, for example. I don't remember when I talked to folks about my magic post dates, but the notes for May 5 were a boring list of all the errands I ran that day. You really don't want to read about my trip to Menard's, Borders, Bed, Bath & Beyond, The Chalet and Macy's. You definitely don't want to read about how I managed to buy a pair of earrings before lunch and lose one of them before dinner.

Toe Tuesday

When Theo was treated for his broken toe four years ago, we actually got a film copy of his foot xray. Now, of course, the xrays are on the hospital network. If you doctor isn't on the hospital network, they copy the xray to disk and you take the disk to the doctor. I was very pleased with myself that not only was I able to find the film but I also remembered to take it with me to our appointment this morning. Thus, the doctor was able to tell us that this time Theo broke the bone on the tip of his toe, but last time he broke the bone just below the joint. So Theo has now broken both of the bones in his left big toe. We also learned that his toe should heal very quickly, probably within a month, which was a little faster than we thought. Basically, the doctor said to take it easy for the next two weeks and after that Theo could slowly return to normal activities. If it hurt, he should stop. If the toe still bothered him in a month, we should come back to the doctor, but other than that, we were good to go. So we went.

Medical Monday

Theo's toe still hurt when he woke up this morning. I decided to take him to the doctor for an xray. I've had a lot of practice with Theo and injury, so I like to think that I've gotten to be a pretty good judge of what warrants a trip to the ER and what doesn't. The toe looked fine and there was no blood, so it definitely didn't rate an immediate trip to the ER, but it hurt bad enough that it wasn't worth waiting around to see if it was sprained and would get better on its own.

Our first stop was the pediatrician. It's actually faster (and cheaper) to go to walk-in hours at the pediatrician and get an order for an xray than to go to the ER. That's one of the reasons we didn't get the xray yesterday afternoon right after Theo hurt himself. Theo's doctor actually had walk-in hours today, which was great. She knows all about Theo and his many injuries. She's the one that called Theo our family's "designated injured person." She put in the order for the xray, made the referral for the orthopedic specialist in case it was broken and wrote a note for me to give to the school nurse in under fifteen minutes.

Stop number two was across the street at the hospital. There's always a wait in radiology, particularly on Mondays. However, it didn't take too long for Theo to have his xray taken. Then we had to sit there and wait for the results. Of course the toe was broken. This actually isn't a big deal. Theo had broken this same toe almost exactly four years ago. If it's a minor break, there isn't much they can do. You tape the broken toe to the toe next to it for support, wear good shoes and give up soccer, running, rock climbing, etc. while the toe heals. A bummer for Theo, but more inconvenient than anything else.

Stop number three was the orthopedic specialist's office. It's in the same building as the pediatrician. I thought it'd be easier to make the appointment in person rather than do it over the phone. Boy, was I wrong. I was informed in no uncertain terms by the office staff that the doctor to whom we'd been referred did not do toes and could not possibly see Theo. Okay, who does do toes? Two doctors that are only in Evanston on Thursdays, but I could call Glenview and get an appointment. I call Glenview. Well, one toe doctor is out of town this week and the other was booked solid well into next week. Sorry, we can't help you. They told me to go back to the pediatrician and get a referral to another office.

Stop number four was back down in the pediatrician's office. Would the nice secretary please tell our doctor that we needed a new referral because the people upstairs wouldn't help us? My pediatrician comes out and gets the whole story from me. She tells me to let her make a few phone calls. She'll get us into the office with somebody. So we go home and wait for someone to call. Just before 5:00pm we finally get a call from the orthopedic office. They offer us an appointment with yet another doctor for 9:45am tomorrow morning. Of course I say yes.

I had hoped to have Theo's foot looked at and have him back in school by lunchtime, but by the time we finish, there's so little left of school. Since Theo's foot still hurt, I decided to let him miss the rest of the day. He'll probably miss most of tomorrow morning, too, by the time all is said and done, but what can you do?

Soccer Sunday

With both boys playing AYSO soccer, our Sunday afternoons in April and May are entirely devoted to soccer. Today, Brendan's game started at noon. Having the first game of the day used to mean going to mass, going to Sunday school, leaving Sunday school a little early and rushing like mad to get to the game a little late. Oh, yeah, and try to make sure that Brendan got something to eat somewhere along the way. As a single parent, I just can't do that anymore. I'm tired of running from one thing to another and always being in a hurry, so I've given up trying to do everything. I decided we would skip church and go straight to soccer. Sunday school is over for the year, which made the decision a little easier. Brendan had a great game. He scored his second goal of the season and this time I was actually there to see it - I missed the first one. I was so pleased for him.

Theo had the late afternoon game, which meant that I actually got to see all of Brendan's game and all of Theo's game. That doesn't happen too often. Usually, their games overlap at least a little and I miss all or part of someone's game. When the weather is bad, the overlapping games mean less time outside, which is great. Otherwise, it's just another single parent nightmare, trying to make sure that I get to see both boys play. I'm also usually begging rides for both of my boys either to the soccer field or home from the game. That's been made much easier by the fact that we've had neighbors and friends on both boys' teams, but it's still a drag and a hassle. Today I didn't have to worry about any of that. Brendan's game was over in plenty of time to get Theo to his game. Since I was there for the whole game, I was also there when Theo injured himself. He had a close run-in with the keeper and seemed okay, but a couple minutes later I noticed that he was limping. It turns out he somehow injured his toe. It hurt bad enough that Theo came out of the game early. We went home and iced his toe. We'll probably have to go get an xray tomorrow.

Breakfast and Dinner

The boys and I spent the morning at the Troop 72 Pancake Breakfast to raise funds for Central United Methodist Church, their sponsoring organization. Well, actually, I spent all morning at the church. Brendan served breakfast the first half of the morning, then spent the rest of the morning playing at a friend's house. Theo spent the first half of the morning sleeping and the second half cooking breakfast. Nobody sent their pancakes back, so I guess he did okay.

I had planned a nice dinner for the three of us: steak au poivre, Greek potatoes and green beans. Brendan got a better offer from a friend - burgers. Theo can't appreciate good food and preferred to eat frozen pizza. I still cooked my nice meal and ate in solitary splendor. I'll save the leftover steak for lunch next week.

Still Digging Those Rocks

It actually took me all of Thursday and most of today to finish putting down my rocks. By the end of school on Thursday I had finished all the digging. However, once I starting laying the rock I realized that I had gone a little overboard on on the digging. I was not about to pick up the rock just to put some dirt back. It seemed easier to just go buy more rock. (!) A total of five trips and over fifty bags of rock later I finally had enough rock. I think it will look great. It's a little hard to tell as the rocks are covered in dust. We'll see what they look like after a good rain storm washes all the dirt off.

I'm Diggin' This

Wow, really on a streak this week - four good days in a row. Started the day on a high note by having breakfast with a friend. Breakfast ran almost all the way to lunch, we were having such a great time. Then I started a yard project I've been meaning to do for several years. I'm putting landscape rock along the fence in the back yard. I'm tired of growing weeds back there. I'm also hoping that the rock will help with the rainwater runoff back there. Before I can put the rock down though, the old mulch and some of the dirt has to come up. That meant three hours with a spade, a shovel and a hoe and a five gallon bucket. Ended the day with a bit of a downer - rehearsal for Theo's confirmation was BORING! However, since the rest of the day was so good, I'm willing to overlook a few things.

Keeping Up the Good Work

Today was another good day, which makes three in a row. I treated myself to a pecan sweet roll for breakfast. I then proceeded to work it off by cleaning the living room and dining room. I was supposed to plan birthday parties for the boys, but decided that I'd done enough work for one day. The boys and I ended the day in front of the tv again as today was TV Tuesday: NCIS and NCIS Los Angeles, our favorite shows. I watch Top Gear, but my heart isn't in it. I live for Tuesdays. Mark Harmon is still handsome, if not as young as he was on St. Elsewhere. The original McDreamy, in my opinion.

On this day in history:
1945 - my mom is born - Happy Birthday, Mom!
1990 - Tim proposed - on the beach, at sunset, on one knee with ring

Getting Off to a Good Start

For the second week in a row, I had a productive start to my week. I planned my meals for the week, bought my groceries and still had time for a nice lunch at Panera before going to Theo's volleyball game after school. After dinner, the boys and I watched the season finale of Top Gear on BBC America. All in all, a very good day. I got done what needed to be done and still had plenty of time to do a few things I wanted to do as well. I think I even got the dinner dishes done.

A Day Off

Today should have been a very busy day. We were supposed to go to 9:30am mass followed by Theo's final confirmation class. Then we were going to rush home to make two soccer games. When I woke up this morning, I decided that I just couldn't do all of that. So we skipped the only thing I had any choice over - mass. Theo still had to go to confirmation class, but that didn't start until 10:45am. Brendan and I went to a nearby bakery during class and had a nice leisurely breakfast. As we left church, it started to pour. Just as I was trying to come to terms with standing outside in the rain for four hours through two soccer games, the phone rang. The park district cancelled all the games! I got my entire afternoon back! The boys and I did do a little housecleaning, but mostly we enjoyed listening to the rain while we rested. I love rainy Sundays!

Running Around Again

Today I finally got Theo registered for summer track camp, something I've been meaning to do since registration opened on April 6. My sleep till noon teenager is voluntarily signing up for a running camp that starts at 6:45am every week day. Which means I have "volunteered" to leave the house at 6:30am every week day to run him across town in my car. Ought to be an interesting four weeks for both of us. I'm not exactly a morning person myself. After all, I spent the entire morning on the couch watching tv. The only thing that got me going today was my promise to be the flower lady for church this week. I had to run to Home Depot for new flowers for the altar, run up to church to drop off the new flowers and take out the old ones and run back to the middle school before band ended at 4pm. I ended the day "helping" our friend Julian install a new wireless access point in our house to replace the two outdated ones Tim installed several years ago. Now we're running around the house finding all the electronic devices that talk to the wireless network and moving them to the new access point. Whew!

Last of the Lasts

Tonight was the spring open house at the middle school. This was the last of the lasts. The last time we did something with Tim, like the last Boy Scout camp out, the last movie we saw together or the last Christmas. The 2009 spring open house was the last school event that Tim attended. A week later he was back in the hospital and never came home again.

We are also nearing the end of the year of firsts. The first father's day without Tim was a week after his death. That was the first first. Theo will be confirmed a week from tomorrow. That will be the first big life event without Tim. I have no doubt that we will encounter many more firsts, but after this June 13, the first anniversary of his death, they will come less often. At least, I hope so, although I don't expect them to be any less painful.

Back and Forth

Today I spent a lot of time in the car going to and from various events. Both boys got rides to school since they both had band today. (Have you ever lifted a euphonium?) Theo leaves for school at 7:00am, Brendan at 8:00am. Then I made a trip into Evanston. I treated myself to breakfast at LePeep. That was the only time I was in the car because I wanted to go someplace. The other trips were mandated by my children's schedules. At 4pm, I picked up Brendan from band at the middle school. Right after that, I drove to another middle school across town to watch Theo play volleyball. Got home just before 5 o'clock. We had forty-five minutes to make and eat dinner before Theo and I were back in the car headed across town again for soccer. I dropped Theo off at soccer and drove home. I had half an hour to help Brendan with his homework before I had to get back in the car to go pick up Theo. Dropped Theo off at home to do his homework and took Brendan to Boy Scouts. I went back home to "supervise" Theo's homework. At 9:00pm, I went back out for my ninth and final trip of the day to pick Brendan up and bring him home.

Bad Lunch, Good Dinner

Today I had to do some reverse shopping. I had a gazebo to return to Menard's and a coffee maker to return to Macy's. After returning the gazebo, I decided that even though I hadn't planned on eating out, I really needed to have some lunch before heading to Macy's. There aren't many options on my route from Menard's to Macy's. I ended up at a Panda Express. Eating at Panda Express is a bit like eating movie popcorn. It always looks and smells better than it tastes. When I got back from my errands, I had planned to work on my Quicken files. I needed to clean my desk first, though. By the time I got to the bottom of the pile it was time to start dinner. Oh, well. Tonight was my turn to pick the dinner menu - baked chicken, baby carrots and sour cream & chive potatoes. I had plenty of food in the house and no one had any activities that interfered with a good sit down dinner. Nights like that are extremely rare during soccer season.

When Had To and Want To Meet

Today was one of those rare days when I actually wanted to do many of the daily chores that had to be done. In a totally unplanned and amazing feat of productivity, I cleaned my kitchen, did the laundry, planned meals, did grocery shopping AND helped set up the middle school book fair. The only thing I wanted to do but didn't get around to was working on my Quicken files. Since I got so much else done, I don't feel too badly about not doing this one thing. While I don't expect to be this productive every day, it made a nice change from last week when it took me all week to finish the laundry.

Finally Folded the Laundry

Today I finally folded the laundry. I also made a Tres Leche cake to take to a friends' house for dinner. I love this dessert, but it takes forever and makes a huge cake, so I only make it for company. We had a great time. Well, Brendan had a great time because these friends have a son his age and he was spending the night. I had a great time because I got to have some adult conversation. Theo tolerated spending the evening with a bunch of younger kids after spending all afternoon at a confirmation retreat. It just wasn't Theo's day.

How Not to Fold Laundry

1. Go pick up a gazebo that is on sale at Menard's.
2. Decide that gazebo from Menard's isn't going to work.
3. Take all afternoon to check out gazebos at three other stores.
4. Take youngest son to soccer practice.
5. Decide it's too late to fold laundry and write a week's worth of blog entries.

Being Florence Nightingale

Today I was going to give that laundry another go. Just as I was sitting down to fold clothes, the school nurse called. Theo wasn't feeling well. I picked him up and got him settled on the couch at home just in time for his stomach to reject his lunch. Apparently, the stomach bug is making the rounds at school. There are many things that get easier as your kids get older. Handling the stomach flu is definitely one of those things. Both of my boys are now old enough to recognize the signs of imminent hurlage and can actually hit the basin. Long gone are the days of unexpected projectile vomiting and with it the extra laundry and cleanup of mom and kid. They are also old enough to cope with illness with the application of large amounts of TV. Theo in particular, when he is not feeling totally wretched, is quite happy to have an excuse to perfect his couch potato skills. The DVR is a big boon in this department, as we usually have an average of 7-10 hours of recorded shows waiting to be watched. I will admit that I would not have chosen to watch Charlie and the Chocolate Factory when I had the stomach flu, but it seemed to suit Theo just fine.

Doing my Taxes

Today I had planned to fold the clothes I washed yesterday. I told you that I can't grocery shop and wash and fold clothes in one day. But first I had to finish those taxes. Uncle Sam doesn't care if my laundry is wrinkled. Once I finished writing the tax checks, I just didn't feel like folding the laundry. I wish I could say that finishing the taxes took longer than expected and wore me out. The truth is, all I had to do was write and mail two checks, one to the Feds and one to the state. I actually hired someone to do my taxes for the first time ever. Tim usually did the taxes. I did them last year under his supervision. This year I just didn't want to worry about them at all. So back in February I got some recommendations and hired an accountant. He was worth his hire. He found a deduction that I never would have found. That deduction was for more than his fee. And just like the MasterCard commercials, the piece of mind I got from having someone else do the fiddly bits was priceless. Anyway, I wrote my two checks, addressed and stamped the envelopes and put it all in the mailbox. After virtuously doing about 15 minutes of work, including the walk to the mailbox on the corner, I rewarded myself by sitting down to read the book I bought yesterday. And read and read and read. I never folded the laundry and never got around to making dinner. So even though I hadn't planned on doing so, I caved in to the request of my children and ordered pizza for dinner. Again.

Chores

Monday is usually chore day for me, since I spend most of the weekend ferrying the boys to and from various activities. Today was no exception. I had to go grocery shopping. We had plenty of food in the house, just not enough of the right variety to provide what might pass for a complete and nutritious dinner. I had not planned on doing laundry as well, but Brendan requested clean socks. I usually try to do laundry and grocery shopping on separate days because when I combine them on the same day they don't get done well. Sometimes I'll buy the groceries but not get around to putting everything away. Or I'll do the laundry but run out of steam before folding everything. I had planned to finish my taxes, but just couldn't face one more chore after washing clothes and buying groceries. The one thing I did just for fun was to buy a book while out doing my shopping. As I've said before, you don't have to twist my arm to get me to add to my book collection.

Lazy Day

Today I had planned on getting several things done around the house. Instead, I wasted most of the day watching television. The only thing I did do was the dishes, and only because we'd run out of glasses. I didn't even make dinner. It was just Theo and I, since Brendan was off with the Boy Scouts. So we ordered a pizza and watched some more TV.

Time with Friends

Today I had planned on having coffee with a friend. Of course, neither of us planned on her getting so wrapped up in her work that she forgot our appointment. Fortunately, she was free for lunch, so our meeting was merely delayed instead of cancelled.

After school, I had to help Brendan pack for this weekend's Boy Scout camp out. He leaves right after school tomorrow, so his packing needed to be done today. It's his first tent camping outing. I hope it won't be too cold or too wet. April weather is very chancy around here.

This evening I got to do something truly fun for a change. A friend from church is a musician and composer. He was playing in Evanston this evening. So I left the boys at home and went to listen to him perform. I didn't arrive until the second set. Some of the audience had clearly been drinking since well before the first set, so it was a very amusing evening.

Running Around Town

Today I had to go to the bookstore. I love going to bookstores. I love buying books. I go to the bookstore and buy books much more often than I should. However, today I had a legitimate need to go to the bookstore. Theo needed a book for literature class. His lit class is reading cross cultural autobiographies. He is reading a graphic novel written by a young woman who grew up in Iran during the Islamic Revolution. It is called "Persepolis" and according to Theo, it's a pretty good book.

I hadn't planned on leaving the bookstore with more than Theo's book, but all the romantic comedy DVDs were 40 percent off. So I picked up copy of "Under the Tuscan Sun." I really admire the main character's guts for seizing the chance to rebuild her life when the opportunity presented itself. It would be really cool if my chance was as neat as rebuilding an old Italian villa. Anybody want to buy me a ticket to a gay tour of Tuscany?

While I was out, I stopped into Macy's to spend a gift card I had received. It's so much more fun to spend other people's money. This gift card was given to me with explicit instructions not to spend it on anything practical. It was so much fun to look only at those things I would never buy if I was spending my own money. I picked up a fancy single cup coffee maker. After I got it home, I decided that it makes terrible coffee. So I'm returning it and I will get to spend another afternoon looking for impractical gifts for myself.

So, I had to go to the bookstore, I hadn't planned on buying a DVD and I bought a coffee maker because I felt like it. What had I planned on doing but didn't? I had planned on running all over Skokie with Theo after school. On Wednesdays, Theo has volleyball games after school until 5:30pm, soccer from 6-7pm and scouts from 7:30 until 9:00pm. Lucky for me, today's soccer practice was cancelled due to bad weather. There was still volleyball and scouts, but no soccer meant that we all got to eat dinner at home instead of in the car on our way to or from someplace else.

Catching Cold

I had all sorts of plans for when we got home from vacation. However, those plans did not include catching Theo's cold, which is what I did. So all my plans went out the window. I did only what I had to do, which was enough laundry and cooking to get by. I did only what I wanted to do, if you can say that I wanted to be sick and sleep on the couch for the better part of a week.

Spring Break

This week was spring break for the boys. We spent the week in Florida with my parents. They rented a very nice condo on the beach. Unfortunately, the boys and I had to travel late at night and early in the morning to get reasonable air fares. We had planned for better weather, but we had the Florida equivalent of a Chicago lake breeze. The temperatures were actually cooler on the beach than at home in Skokie. There was still plenty of sun, however, so we all ended up with sunburns. That was definitely not planned.

Today is Tim's birthday. He would have been 43. The boys and I chose not to formally mark the day, but Tim was definitely on our minds. Tim was not a big beach fan. He didn't care for the feel of sand between his toes and usually wore tennis shoes when we'd go for walks on the beach. However, there were two things he always liked to do when we would go visit my parents. Tim loved to fly kites, particularly two-line steerable kites. I had packed a few kites. Since we did have such a strong breeze, the kids and I took turns flying Tim's favorite kite. Then we put up a single line kite with a lot of line laundry. Line laundry is what you call things like wind socks and spinners that you attach to the kite line with clips. The kite carries them up into the sky. We put up two wind socks, two small spinners and a giant circular spinner. They attracted a lot of attention, which is the whole idea, of course.

The other thing Tim enjoyed doing at the beach was building elaborate sand castles. I always found this a little hard to reconcile with his dislike of sand, but accepted it as one of those quirks that made Tim who he was. I have many pictures of Tim with sand castles built over the course of our marriage. So of course the boys and I built a sand castle. We went out just before high tide and built our castle right at the high tide mark. I don't ever remember doing this with Tim before, but it turned out to be a lot of fun. We all enjoyed watching the tide gradually undermine and wash away our castle. It was a lot better than abandoning our sculpture and hoping that no one would crush it. I even found it more satisfying than the Godzilla imitation that the boys were planning.

Wandering Through Evanston

This morning I had coffee in Evanston with a friend who lost his father as a teenager. He very generously shared his memories of his father's illness and death with me. Sometimes it is very helpful to trade stories with others that have experienced the loss of a loved one. I ending up spending the rest of the morning and all afternoon in Evanston. I went to the bank to deposit a check, something I needed to do. But instead of going straight home to start packing as planned, I decided to go to Lulu's for dim sum and then to The Italian Coffee Shop for gelato. I hadn't planned on doing more shoe shopping, but the shoe store was between the coffee shop and my car. I'm glad I went into the store because I finally found a pair of sandals for our trip to Florida next week.

Dinner Dysfunction

This morning I had to finish up the laundry. As a reward for my good behavior, I spent some time writing. I keep daily notes in a hand written journal and turn them into blog entries later. I spent longer working on the blog than I had planned and ended up eating a very late lunch. I had hoped that the boys and I would eat dinner together, but of course it didn't work out that way, again. In fact, not only did we not eat together, we each ate at a separate time. Theo came home late from school and didn't get snack, so he was ready to eat early. Brendan did get an afternoon snack but was ready to eat at the usual time. Since I'd had a late lunch, I wasn't ready for dinner until late. It just hasn't been my week for effective meal planning.

Making Plans

Today I couldn't put it off any longer. I finally had to go grocery shopping and do some laundry. To make the laundry go down easier, I watched a movie on the DVR while I folded the clean clothes. I had hoped to spend the afternoon reading a book. Instead, I spent it on the phone with my mother and brother. We're trying to rent a house in Wisconsin this summer. It's very difficult to find a house and location to suit five adults with very different ideas of leisure, not to mention the accompanying teenager, middle schooler, preschooler and toddler.

Food Fight

Today I had planned to go grocery shopping. Somehow I ended up shopping for shoes instead, which was a lot more fun. No groceries meant a change of plans for dinner. Since I had to take Theo into Evanston for a confirmation class requirement, we got takeout for dinner. The boys and I couldn't agree on a restaurant, so I gave them money for Uber Burger and I went next door to Mt. Everest. This made everybody happy except Brendan. He didn't enjoy getting dragged all over town when he had a lot of homework to do.

A Night at the Opera

This morning I had to pay my bills. I hadn't planned on spending all morning on the task, but I recently moved all my finances to Quicken and I'm still learning how to use the program. That meant I didn't get to planning my menus for the week as I had hoped. Instead, I had to stop and get ready for my big night out. A good friend took me out for a night on the town. This night actually started at 4:30 in the afternoon and lasted until midnight and included dinner and a ticket to the opera. The boys were in bed and the house was still standing when I got home, so they obviously survived being left to their own devices for that long.

A Morning of Mourning

There was no Sunday School this morning, so I left the boys at home and went to church alone. I don't know if it was the music for the day or the fact that it's been just over nine months since Tim died or that it's his birthday in ten days, but I cried all through mass. Sheil (our church) was an integral part of our relationship from the very beginning. Going to Sheil and singing in the choir has been a source of immense comfort to me both throughout Tim's illness and after his death. As much as I draw strength from the Sheil community, it can also be very painful to be in a place that holds so many memories of Tim. It's not just my memories, either. A friend once told me that she liked to watch Tim when I sang, because his love showed so clearly on his face. I often think of that story when I am standing up front with the choir. It makes me very sad to know that Tim is no longer sitting in the pews with the boys, listening to me and smiling.

So after doing something I wanted to do (go to church) and something I hadn't planned to do (cry a lot), I went home and did something I had to do - laundry. I had planned on serving leftovers, but, surprise, surprise, my dining companions rejected that choice, so we settled for frozen taquitos.

Snowy Science

Today was the regional Science Olympiad in Naperville, an hour's drive from our house. Theo had to be at school at 6:30am to catch the bus. Brendan and I followed a couple hours later to show our support for McCracken. (They came in sixth and will not be attending the state contest in April.) While I felt obligated to attend, I did not feel obliged to leave at the crack of dawn. Particularly since it snowed this morning - a very wet, heavy snow that made driving very unpleasant. So much for yesterday's lovely weather.
I had planned to have a good family dinner after our day's adventure in Naperville, but I didn't realize how long the competition would run. We were at Naperville from early in the morning until very late in the afternoon. That meant we ended up eating fast food for breakfast, lunch and dinner. Not my idea of a good food day.
Actually, between the weather, the length of the competition, its unhappy outcome and the bad food, it was a less than great day all the way around. Here's hoping tomorrow will be better.

Spring Fever

Our string of beautiful days continues. I was so inspired by the weather that I pulled a spring skirt out of my closet to wear today. I did manage to get to the library and return all those BBC mystery shows that kept interfering in my life earlier this week. That's about the sum total of my accomplishments for the day. I had planned to sit down at my computer and pay bills, but the weather was just too nice to be stuck in the basement. Apparently I haven't recovered from my cooking frenzy on Wednesday night, either. I couldn't summon up the energy to go grocery shopping or cook something as I had fully intended to do. Instead, I splurged and ordered takeout from The Noodle in Wilmette.

White Screen of Death and Big Blue Skies

Do you remember the Window's "Blue Screen of Death?" Well, Theo's iPod Touch did the white screen of death the other day. We tried rebooting the thing. We tried re-synching the thing. Heck, we even tried restoring the thing from backup. Nothing. So today I promised to take it to our local Apple store and see what they could do for us. As it happens, I had recently been through all of last year's credit card slips while doing my taxes. This meant that I was able to find the receipt and prove that the thing was less than a year old. I handed the iPod to the "Genius" at the "Genius Bar" and waited. Less than ten minutes later, the Genius comes to me and says, "Congratulations, you are getting a brand new iPod!" I was pleased to learn that there was actually something seriously wrong with the thing. The alternative was proof that I am an electronic moron whose chief technical geek left her in the lurch last June. While this may be true, iPods are supposed to be idiot proof, so while I may be a moron, at least I'm not an idiot.

The other thing I had planned to do today was finish the dishes from last night's dinner party. The ones I didn't do because Theo brought out his iPod with the white screen of death. I still didn't get them done. After running my dishwasher three times yesterday, I just couldn't stand doing anymore dishes. So instead I sought refuge in yet another season of Foyle's War from the library. Then I went to pick up Brendan from school. We are still enjoying unusually warm sunny weather. It didn't take more than one glance up at the intense blue skies overhead for me to give in to Brendan's request to stay after school and play. My dishes will still be there tomorrow.

Dinner and a Movie

Today I invited a friend over for dinner. This gave me an excuse to mess around in the kitchen. I welcomed the chance to cook adult food for someone that might actually enjoy the meal and not complain if there were vegetables on the plate. I tried out some recipes from a Barefoot Contessa show on Food Network. I made Ina Garten's Company Pot Roast, Irish Soda Bread and Baked Potatoes with Sour Cream and Yogurt Dressing. Then, just for fun, I made my Grandma Gus' sugar cookies in the shape of four leaf clovers for St. Patrick's Day.

All that cooking meant a lot of dishes. I have a very small kitchen with an equally small amount of counter space. I had to do yesterday's dishes before I could even start cooking. Once the dishwasher was running, I started to put the pot roast together. I love trying out recipes from the Food Network, but these chefs clearly don't do their own dishes. After the pot roast was in the oven, I realized that I'd have to clean the kitchen before I'd have room to make anything else. So I unloaded the dishwasher and cleared off my counter. Next I made the sugar cookie dough. It has to chill for an hour before cutting and baking the cookies. Into the fridge it went and into the dishwasher went the mixing bowls and measuring cups. The dishwasher was now full, so I ran the it for the second time that day. I mixed up the sour cream and yogurt dressing. That only took one bowl, one measuring cup and one spatula, thank goodness. So I didn't have to clean the kitchen again before rolling, cutting and baking the sugar cookies. Again, not a dish-intensive operation, so I was able to move right on to the Irish soda bread. It was actually very easy to make, but did make another sinkful of dirty dishes. So for the third time, I unloaded and reloaded my dishwasher.

I had planned on having all my cooking and cleaning done well before my friend arrived, but this was not to be. I had been to the library a few days before and checked out entire seasons of several BBC mystery shows. Once I dropped the boys off at school, I came home and made a huge pot of tea and sat down to enjoy a television show. One show lead to a second and a third and before I knew it, I had watched an entire set of Foyle's War. My marathon cooking and cleaning session began well after I meant to start. Throw in time for the shower I had neglected to take earlier in the day and suddenly I found myself worried that dinner would be late. It was, but, lucky for me, my friend was coming from downtown and he was late as well.

After a very good dinner (if I do say so myself) accompanied by a great deal of wine and good conversation, I had planned to do the dishes one last time and go to bed early. Again, this was not to be. Theo informed me that his ipod was on the fritz. That was putting things mildly. I don't know if you've seen the flashlight app for the ipod, but that's what Theo's ipod looked like - a blank white screen with no sound. So I was up quite late trying various things to fix Theo's ipod. I gave up around 11:30pm and went to bed.

Had To, Wanted To, Planned To...

Today I had to go grocery shopping. Sometimes I enjoy grocery shopping, especially when I'm planning for a dinner party. Today was not one of those days. Today was all about keeping my boys supplied with Poptarts, Gatorade and Crunch Bars. All those things that the First Lady tells me I shouldn't feed my children. All those things without which my children swear they can't survive. All those things that make my life as a single parent just a little easier. Since Tim is no longer here to listen to his share of gripes, I have decided that a little extra junk food goes a long way toward keeping not just my children happy but keeping me happy.

While I was out doing the shopping I needed to do, I decided to do a little shopping that I wanted to do and stopped in at the shoe store. I did severe damage to my best black heels over the winter. I had the misfortune to be wearing them one day when it just poured and poured. I knew it was going to rain very heavily that day. Under normal circumstances, I would have worn sensible shoes but I was dressed up to attend a funeral that afternoon. To make matters even worse, I was parked quite a distance from the church. It was a long, wet slog through some very substantial puddles. My feet and the bottom several inches of my pantsuit were soaked by the time the funeral was over. The shoes have never been the same. I wasn't able to replace my shoes today. As too often happens, all the shoes where either the wrong size, the wrong style or the wrong price. Guess I'll have to try again another day.

Today was one of our first truly warm spring days. It was sunny for the first time in days and the temperature climbed well above normal. This being Chicago, I am well aware that it won't last. Spring in Chicago is a chancy thing. Fall weather is generally more consistent. It is more likely to be warm and sunny in October than March. That being said, I have learned to take advantage of the good weather when it presents itself. So today we had an impromptu barbeque. Thankfully, there was still gas in the grill and it lit on the first try. Brendan and I enjoyed mini pub burgers, chips and soda for dinner.

Where was Theo you ask? He was at school preparing for this weekend's Science Olympiad tournament. The teacher warned us not to expect our children home for dinner. However, I did not expect Theo to be out until after 9pm. This ruined my evening plans for a little family time. The boys and I have become big fans of NCIS and NCIS Los Angeles. We look forward to Tuesday evenings and a little family togetherness on the couch. Tonight it was not to be. Oh, well, thanks to our DVR, our family time is postponed, not gone for good.

So there you have something I had to do today, something I wanted to do today, something I hadn't planned to do today and something I had planned on doing, but didn't. For the next week, I am going to try blogging around the idea of had to, wanted to, planned to and didn't plan. I haven't written in a long time because I couldn't decide what to write about. I have missed writing and I hope that having a format that can give structure to writing about even very ordinary things. Looking forward to sharing more with you...